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Viewer SpaceCatFlow asked, ‘do I still need to do regular meditation (closing eyes, sitting) continuously? Or can I let regular meditation go and just focus being mindful all day 24/7?’
I get this question a lot, and for good reason.
We only ever have a single moment in which to practice: now. So, naturally, we want to be sure we’re using it correctly. But what is ‘correct practice’? And how can we be sure when there are thousands of different interpretations out there from wisdom traditions across time and culture?
Which Spiritual Teaching Is Right?
Some teachers say you must practice at the same time every day, and for the same duration; others say formal meditation is unnecessary, and you should just do moment-to-moment mindfulness. Some say you must sit with your back straight; others say it doesn’t matter.
I struggled with this for years. But the key point, I realized, was in the deep meaning of the term ‘direct experience’. It’s what you experience—without interpretation, judgment or description—that really matters. What actually occurs for you when you do formal meditation? What actually occurs for you when you do moment-to-moment mindfulness? This is a very different question to ‘which traditional description of what occurs during meditation is my experience closest to?’
And besides, if you’re like everyone else, lots of things will happen during practice, and so the real game is doing enough of each to gather data.
The Buddha’s Compass
It’s easy to feel lost, but I can give you a compass: the Buddha’s compass. In the ancient texts, the Buddha told a large assembly of monks that he taught only one thing: dukkha, dukkha-nirodha—meaning, ‘dissatisfaction and the cessation of dissatisfaction’.
Using this compass, you can orient yourself.
When you practice formal sitting meditation, do you experience more dissatisfaction or less? Do you experience more stress, desire, aversion, anxiety, doubt, guilt, restlessness, self-loathing, ill-will or less? And when you practice moment-to-moment mindfulness as you go about your day, do you experience more dissatisfaction or less? Do you experience more stress, desire, aversion, anxiety, doubt, guilt, restlessness, self-loathing, ill-will or less?
As you compare the two types of practice, does one or the other lead to greater calmness, ease, contentment than the other? If so, do more of that one!
What Is Meditation? What Is Mindfulness?
Of course, the two practices are, in the end, one and the same. In fact, I like to define ‘meditation’ as ‘the dedication of distraction-free time to the practice of mindfulness’. And I define ‘mindfulness’ as ‘the practice of seeing clearly’.
My first teacher, a senior Buddhist monk, gave a delightful metaphor.
‘The beginning musician,’ he said, ‘needs time to practice alone, without distraction. As they get familiar with the skill of playing their instrument, they progress through the following stages…
‘First, they call in a family member to show what they’ve learned. Second, they join a band and rehearse with them. Third, they perform on stage.
‘Each of these stages requires greater familiarity and skill. But there’s one further level, demonstrated by only the best musicians.
‘The best musicians, no matter where they are; no matter what’s going on around them, are just playing. They’ve become so familiar with their instrument that performing with it—even at the highest level—is no different to riding a bike.’
We can apply this model to the practice of mindfulness. And you can actually experiment with what I’m about to share in your own practice to see what level is the best fit for you.
A Modern Gradual Path Of Practice
First, of course, we have the classical, seated calm abiding meditation. You go to a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed, you get comfortable, and you focus on your breathing.
Second, once there’s some familiarity, practitioners ‘graduate’ to walking meditation. Here, the breath is no longer the ‘meditation object’—the sensations of walking are used instead. These are more varied, and thus this is considered a more advanced practice by comparison.
In the modern world, it’s useful to go further.
So third, you can go out in public and use the sounds and sights of the crowd as an evolving meditation object.
Fourth, you can meditate in conversation. This is challenging because in conversation there is a demand upon you to respond. Can you maintain meditative stability even as your boss is shouting unreasonable demands at you?
Finally, having practised all of this, at some point you’ll be able to take anything and everything as an ongoing meditation object, at which point you’ve ‘dissolved the boundary between meditation and non-meditation’.
This model demonstrates what is called the ‘gradual path’. It presents a step-by-step progression. But something fascinating happens for practitioners who take this all the way…
The Realization At The End of The Path
These practitioners all come to realize that there was never really anything in the way of meditative stability, which is a natural aspect of awareness itself—regardless of what appears within it. It only seemed to be interrupted because they ‘bought in’ to the various things they experienced, and invested them with meaning. Thus those things, themselves, seemed to have the power to make the practitioner think and feel other things in reaction. Then they thought even more thoughts and felt even more feelings in reaction to their previous thoughts and feelings, which gave rise to all the stories we tell about the world, its phenomena, and ourselves.
If you practice enough—whether seated, standing or dancing in a nightclub—you will come to your own decisive experience of emptiness: the realization that ‘things’ only exist in the thinking mind. Without thinking—without interpretations, judgments, labels and descriptions—’things’ do not exist.
To you, a mountain is a mountain. To an ant, what you call a mountain is outside the range of perception—but a sand castle is equivalent to a mountain.
Perception is only relative, but we use labels as if they have absolute meaning.
And this gets us into all kinds of trouble (for example, when we assume our boss will be unreasonable and go in expecting a fight, causing them to retaliate when actually they were in a good mood this morning).
Mindfulness 101: There is Only The Present Moment
When we first hear this, we understand it intellectually: ’yes, it makes sense—the past and future are imaginary.’ But understanding this experientially is profoundly different. Understanding presence at the gut level means it is absurd to consider that there is any kind of solidity whatsoever to the past and future. We see, then, that the past and future are mere mental fabrications—not without their usefulness but, ultimately, empty. Realizing this, it’s not uncommon for us to burst into laughter! (I’ve enjoyed many 30-minute giggling fits with students following their realization.)
Thus, you need not force yourself through the model of gradual development I presented just now, nor any other (there are hundreds, at least). If you can simply rest naturally without seeking or describing anything—just for a brief moment—then the need for any form of deliberate practice is cut through right then and there! But if you find this to be inaccessible—if you insist that you must do something in order to figure out how to stop doing something—then you can use models of gradual development as a means of ‘loosening your grip’ on reality until you’re finally ready to let go.
Again, experimentation is key. Ask freshly, again and again, ‘what happens when I rest naturally? Can I relax into what is occurring without interpretation, judgment, label or description? Can I let it be just as it is? Or do I find it irresistible to wish the moment were different somehow?’
If you’re like every student I’ve ever worked with, you’ll report that it’s easier to rest in some circumstances; more difficult in others. This is perfectly normal and natural. Your practice, then, is to use your restful moments as the example to aspire to in all other moments. And if some moments seem impossible to accept as they are—for example when your boss is shouting in your face—then that may be the time to apply a more deliberate practice. Try focusing on your breathing while your boss shouts in your face and see what that does. Does it make it easier? Harder? Why?
You Can Walk The Path Alone, But You Don’t Have To
No doubt, you can hear that there are a lot of possibilities regarding how to approach this. This is what I spend most of my time guiding students through. If you’re going it alone, there’s nothing wrong with relying on a model of gradual development for support. Get comfortable with your sitting practice, then try walking; get comfortable with walking, then try going somewhere public. Keep experimenting, and if you have questions, drop them in a comment for me.
If you want guidance, take my 1-minute quiz, then opt in to have a conversation with me via email. We’ll talk about what your practice is like right now, then see if there’s value in you receiving some help.
With love from my sofa,
dg💙
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